Each of Us has an Inner Child Inside of Us
Do you ever feel like you’re not good enough? Like you’re constantly falling short, no matter how hard you try? If so, it’s likely that your inner child is feeling neglected.
Your inner child is the part of you that feels positive emotions like happiness, love, and joy. It’s also the part of you that’s most vulnerable to hurt and childhood pain.
When you were a child, your inner child was always present. But as you grew older, you probably started to listen to the voice of constant self-criticism more than the voice of your inner child.
As a result, your inner child became buried under a mound of negative thoughts and emotions. The good news is that it’s never too late to reconnect with your inner child.
By making time for activities that make you feel happy and by speaking kindly to yourself, you can give your inner child the attention it needs to thrive.
Is The Inner Child Real? What Does It Know?
Many people think of their “inner child” as the part of them that is playful and carefree. However, your inner child is actually the presence that has been with you since your conception.
This part of you is always available to help you remember what it feels like to be connected to your feelings. When you listen to your inner child, you can gain more insight into what is happening in your life and make choices that avoid conflict and hurt feelings.
However, it is important to remember that your inner child is also vulnerable and can be easily overwhelmed by strong emotions. If you find yourself feeling overwhelmed, take a few deep breaths and imagine yourself surrounded by healing light.
This will help to calm your inner child and allow you to focus on the present moment in healthy ways.
How Our Inner Child Communicates with Us if We Have Learned to Listen.
It’s interesting to think about the wounded inner child within each of us and how that child can influence our adult relationships and affect our mental health.
When our inner child is wounded, it can make us feel a little numb and prevent us from developing good relationships and self-regulation. Our outer reality is always reflecting our inner reality back to us.
However, when we are able to heal our wounded inner children, we can find happiness and thrive in society. If you find yourself struggling in adult relationships, it might be because your inner child is wounded and in need of attention.
By taking the time to heal your inner child, you will be able to develop healthy, satisfying relationships with others.
Healing Your Wounded Inner Child…
Healing the wounded inner child is at the heart of all great spiritual work. It was once so for me.
The deep inner wounds that I had suffered in childhood were never healed… until I began to do conscious spiritual work.
That’s when my true healing journey began, and it has served as an example to me ever since.
How can you begin healing your inner child inside? What does it take to soothe the pain of our past child self and move into a better present and future?
If you’re willing, here are some activities to heal your inner child:
1. Taking Care of Your Inner Child
First, learn to love your own wounded inner child. Not everyone spends time doing this kind of inner child work, but it is important. So I’ll share the basics here as a way of introduction.
Parents usually neglect or hurt their children as they do what comes naturally – seek to make themselves happy and avoid pain, therefore transferring the burden of their own childhood trauma.
This is inevitable for any child with selfish parents, and many grow up with an unmet need for love and attention which is what the adult self spends their life seeking.
As adults who faced emotional neglect as children, we often remain stuck in an inner world of pain and longing. We may act like angry or wounded inner children ourselves, unaware that this is what we are doing.
But you can learn to dissolve your pain on the spot by bridging into the child within you with this simple practice:
Wherever you are, take a moment to remember the child you once were. Right now, wherever you are, breathe in all your sadness, anger, and pain (let them fill your whole torso) as if it were filling that little boy or girl within you.
Then breathe out relaxation into that child’s body, his or her neck and face, arms and hands, torso and chest, belly, legs, and feet.
If, you are willing to spend time, sense or imagine that all of your pain is flowing into the earth through your heels. It seems to me that I feel this happen in my body when it is happening in my psyche.
Mindfulness brings me directly into the inner child experience as I am seeing with clarity. This clarity allows the process of self-parenting to work.
2. Healing Your Parents
The next step is to heal your parents, who were the source of the pain you suffered as a child. You can do this by bridging into their child within them and then healing that wounded child.
3. Healing Others Who Have Hurt You.
This step may sound surprising, but it is one of the most powerful ways to free yourself from the past. In truth, we all need to be grateful for those who have hurt us, because they also did the best they could at the time. Without childhood experience, we may never have learned self-compassion.
Your spirit-guide books can help here. Read them and do what they say. A good book on this subject is ” The Disappearance of the Universe,” by Gary R. Renard.
4. Honoring Your Inner Child
Finally, take good care of your inner child. Do things that please and delight him or her. Treat yourself to the small and large joys in life that you deserve.
A powerful way to do this is by giving yourself affirmations that honor your inner child. Here are two examples:
“I love you.”
“I am deeply grateful to you.”
One woman wrote, “When I stand in front of the mirror and say ‘I love you over and over again to myself, tears stream down my face because deep inside I feel like I deserve to be loved. It’s strange that it doesn’t come naturally.”
It is toxic for your wounded inner child to believe that he or she deserves emotional pain – to remain feeling stuck in this kind of self-pity any longer than necessary.
The hurt was not your fault! Your parents did the best they could at the time, even though they may have been acting out negative roles given to them by their own parents or society as a whole. Give yourself permission to heal. That is what this work is all about.
Three Common Ways Children Feel Unsafe
In today’s society, there are many ways that children can feel unsafe. One of the most common is physical safety. This can be due to physical neglect, abuse, or even just living in a dangerous neighborhood.
Another way children suffer is emotional abuse. This can be due to inner child wounds that have never been healed, or due to being emotionally neglected by their parents or other adults in their life.
Lastly, children can feel unsafe spiritually. This can be due to being raised in a religion that is not nurturing, or due to being exposed to dark energy or entities. All of these ways can leave children feeling scared, alone, and unsupported.
What is Inner Child Work??
Inner child work is a form of psychotherapy/embodiment healing that seeks to help adults resolve and heal child wounds from their childhood early experiences.
The term “inner child” was coined by the self-help author John Bradshaw, who referred to this concept as part of his Twelve Step program. Inner child work has been described as an existential form of therapy.
The inner child is composed of memories, bodily sensations, emotions, and cognitions that were experienced in childhood. A part of the psyche containing these often unprocessed memories, sensations, etc., is said to be passed on from parent to child.
The inner child is established during the first few years of life and consists of all past experiences up until the present time.
The inner child is not recognized by science or medicine as an actual entity but is instead viewed as a metaphor for the subjective experiences of individuals who consider themselves to be recovering from emotional wounds incurred during childhood.
The inner child holds repressed childhood emotions, and memories that were hurt, discouraged, or otherwise unresolved. Many of these wounds are carried into adulthood where they manifest as neurosis, addiction, and even bipolar disorder.
Inner child work is often done in therapy involving traditional talk therapy along with other techniques such as art therapy intended to heal the root cause of negative emotions and behaviors of the wounded child inside.
By working with the inner child, negative or destructive thought patterns can be replaced by positive ones that will allow for a more fulfilling adult life.
Inner child work is also used to address addictions such as alcoholism and drug abuse, which are often rooted in an individual’s unresolved emotions from childhood.
During the healing process, clients would often imagine their younger selves in a safe place and take the perspective of their inner child to confront past abuses, acknowledge past pain, express difficult emotions such as anger and sadness, and rewrite interactions with parents or other authority figures who may have caused the inner child wounds.
Inner child work is also used to recover from childhood trauma such as rape or other physical abuse.
Some people reach adulthood without ever dealing with their inner child; others do so only when they face a catalyst that leads them to self-discovery.
For those who choose to work with their inner child, certain self-care techniques have been found to be beneficial, such as journaling, art therapy, and meditation.
Being grateful for what you have in your life now instead of focusing on what has been lost from the past hurts and developing a new self-image that is not based on the patterns of internal family systems.
Inner child works also known as (shadow Work) is beneficial in the development of self-compassion and self-love while you override past childhood experiences. During this intense healing work, you are reframing the early years of your life creating a safe space for re-parenting your inner child so you can start healing.
The concept of the inner child within us is not new to humanity however it has only become widely talked about in the proceeding decades though many still seem oblivious to its existence and purpose.
Scientifically speaking “the term “inner child” was first used by John Bradshaw in his 1990 bestseller “Healing The Shame That Binds You.” Inner Child Healing: Freeing Yourself from your Past and Becoming Whole.
The phrase also appears in his PBS television series titled Family Secrets, which ran for three seasons during the early nineties.
However inner child healing programs are certainly not exclusive to either Bradshaw or even psychology as the concept of the inner child can be traced back as far as mainstream religions which also use the term to explain the role of one’s past experiences within their current lives.
‘Inner child’ is a common reference to one’s sense of self and related behaviors, composed primarily of repressed memories and emotions from traumatic or troubling incidents that have occurred throughout a person’s lifetime.
This can include anything ranging from being humiliated in front of others to witnessing abuse however the root cause will always stem from one’s past.
If left untreated this could result in a lack of purpose or ambition, emotional instability, or even physical ailments.
Inner child healing may also be viewed as part of one’s journey through life from birth until death however it is only a small aspect of a far greater whole. Often what we learn is that our experiences define how we live our lives yet these experiences can leave us feeling damaged and broken along with any associated traumas we experienced in the younger part of our lives.
In order to make progress, some kind of release needs to take place with the aim being to learn from our past experiences and eventually move on.
This can only occur through a process of inner child healing however it is not an easy thing to do as many of us have a tendency to avoid confrontation at all costs due to the fear of losing one’s sanity or simply because we don’t want to feel pain anymore.
In order for inner child healing to be successful then those involved need to look deep within themselves in order to understand why they behave as they do.
In some cases, this may require professional assistance as mentioned by Dr. Joe Rubino who states that “many times people think, ‘I’m going crazy. No, you’re not going crazy – there are just things stuck within you that need your attention.”
In reality, pain or discomfort is a natural part of the human condition albeit something we wish to avoid at all costs which can lead to mental illness.
For example, children go through a lot of pain during childhood due to factors ranging from being bullied by others to being forced into marriage (in some countries) by their parents which not only disturbs them but will also limit their mental health.
In many ways, this can result in an entire generation experiencing mental health problems later in life through the cause remains that is ingrained within one’s real-life past experiences.
Therefore dealing with such issues requires a tremendous amount of courage and inner strength. However, it can be done with time and patience while sometimes even requiring professional help via coaching or somatic work.
For example, as well as the understanding that there is no magical pill to make everything better overnight. This can be related to the concept of self-love which is often misunderstood despite being a vital part of one’s well-being.
Ultimately, there are various ways to go about healing oneself however it must first begin with an acceptance that something isn’t right which includes accepting how you feel.
This can be difficult for some as oftentimes people become accustomed to who they are and how they feel, along with the way in which they live their daily life ignoring emotional needs.
Accepting things for what they truly are can be a painful process however it is necessary to allow oneself to move forward in life while also understanding that you deserve love & happiness too.
This process must take place within one’s heart before anything else happens as when this occurs then it can be reflected within one’s inner self along with their interactions with others, i.e., positive thinking & emotions which will, in turn, lead to physical changes.
Types of Inner Child Trauma
The following signs indicate that the person is still occupied with their inner child, which was wounded in one way or another.
– Withdrawn, detached, very shy – especially if the trauma occurred in childhood.
– The individual refuses to love anybody, assuming that no one is deserving of their affection. They cannot trust people therefore they self-sabotage healthy relationships.
– In a relationship, the person is afraid to say “no”, because they fear that they will hurt or anger their partner. This leads them to always say “yes” and not stand up for themselves so that no one can possibly get angry at them while ignoring their own needs.
– The person has difficulties making decisions as an adult.
– The person has a very variable mood. They become aggressive or unhappy for no apparent reason, and sometimes these mood swings are quite intense.
– The person feels empty inside, but they hide it by being super active and going from one extreme to the next.
– Self-destructive behavior: alcohol, drugs, eating disorders, self-harm, etc.
– Self-harm is also a sign of inner child wounding. People who have cut themselves have usually been abused during childhood. They are reenacting the physical pain they once endured in order to release the emotional pain they still carry inside them.
– Psychological neglect has led to self-esteem issues, especially when it comes to emotional expressions in relationships. They cannot feel worthy of being loved or loving another person because they feel unworthy of love because they have never experienced unconditional love.
– The person has an inner feeling of emptiness and hollowness that the inner critic feeds from.
– The person may have a vague fear that something terrible will happen if he starts to feel happy. Regardless of whether or not there is a specific traumatic event that this person associates with past unhappiness, he has the feeling that happiness will turn into sadness at some point.
– The person cannot figure out what they want because they believe their desires are wrong, so they suppress them in order to avoid being punished. Thus, they do not know what they desire.
– The person is very selfish and self-centered because he has never learned how to think of others except in terms of themselves. This is another sign of a lack of empathy towards others stemming from original attachment wounds.
Allow Your Inner Child To Heal.
Anyone who has spent time around children knows that they are often blissfully unaware of the complex trauma and emotional baggage that many adults carry around with them.
In a way, this innocence is a form of strength, as it allows them to approach each day with hope and excitement. However, for adults who have experienced complex trauma, this lack of awareness can be a source of self-sabotage.
By not acknowledging the pain of their past trauma, they prevent themselves from healing and moving on. Instead, they stay stuck in a cycle of pain and self-destruction.
If you want to allow your inner child to heal, it is important to first acknowledge the hurt that you have experienced. Only then can you begin to work through the trauma and emerge on the other side as a stronger person.
We are all Still Children Inside…We All Can Heal…A Rebirth Has to Occur!
Use this as a reminder daily, repeat it to remind yourself of the being that you truly are!
I am the child part inside me. I used to feel afraid, helpless, and sad. I felt abandoned, rejected, and alone. I felt like nobody loved me as much as they should have.
Today, I am a child again. I feel happy, playful, and full of life. I feel secure within myself because you love me unconditionally.
I wish to share my joy with the world around me by being open, giving, and loving toward others who were wounded just as I was.
I will no longer be ashamed of my feelings or desires because I am a good and beautiful person who deserves to be happy.
I accept myself as I am: a loving, joyful, and open child.
Inner Child Meditation
For Healing Inner childhood Trauma, Abused Children, and Abuse Survivors
If you are working on your inner child’s healing, this is the meditation to use.
This may be one of the most important meditations for being able to heal from childhood trauma, abuse, or neglect.
I have used the Inner Child Meditation myself as well as teaching it to many others who are working on inner child work.
The process of comforting and soothing your inner child can help release emotions that you have been holding on to…including the pain, trauma, and hurt from any abusive and /or neglectful childhood experiences.
As you do this work it is very important that you be gentle with yourself and use a good support system so that you do not re-process these memories in a way that brings up too many negative emotions.
After the meditation, it is a good idea to write down any memories or feelings about childhood experiences that may have been brought up, before going on to move forward with your day.
It can be helpful to continue using this meditation daily for at least a few weeks or longer until you feel that you have made some progress in releasing the negative emotions and memories of your childhood.
You can also use this meditation for the inner child of anyone who is close to you, such as a friend or partner.
Imagine putting your hand on their shoulder and reassuring them that everything will be okay…they were not responsible for any abuses or neglect they may have experienced in childhood.
(Takeaway) A Spiritual Touch to Inner Child Healing
How to Heal Childhood Trauma Spiritually
You’ve embarked on the journey of inner child healing, and that’s a courageous act. But what about spirituality? How does it fit into this puzzle? Well, spirituality offers a deep well of resources that you can tap into. From meditation practices to mindfulness exercises, the spiritual realm provides tools that can help you traverse the complex landscape of your psyche.
So, how do you go about it? Simple. Establish a sacred space within you. This is where you commune with your higher self to gain insights into your emotional wounds.
How to Heal Inner Child Trauma
Your inner child is not just a concept; it’s a part of you. And guess what? It wants to be heard, seen, and most importantly, healed. First and foremost, recognize that your inner child exists. Acknowledge its fears, desires, and wounds. Only then can you genuinely begin the healing process.
Journaling: Keep a diary. Write down what your inner child is feeling and why.
Therapy: Sometimes it’s essential to have an external perspective. A therapist can guide you through techniques like guided imagery to meet and console your inner child.
How to Heal Inner Trauma
Healing inner trauma is like peeling an onion; it comes off layer by layer. It’s not a one-time event but a continuous process. Here, mindfulness practices can play a massive role.
Remember, it’s okay not to be okay. Your feelings are valid. Accept them, embrace them, and most importantly, work through them.
How to Heal the Wounded Inner Child
Sometimes the wounds are so deep-seated that they become a part of us. In that case, how to heal the wounded inner child? The key is patience and consistent effort.
Affirmations: Positive affirmations can rewire your thought patterns. Say it loud: “I am worthy. I am loved.”
Art Therapy: Sometimes words can’t express what you feel, but a brush and a set of colors can.
Inner Child Healing Emotional Wounds
When it comes to inner child healing emotional wounds, it’s all about being gentle with yourself. Treat your inner child like you would a real one—with love, care, and endless amounts of patience.
Inner Child Wounded
Recognize that having a wounded inner child is a common human experience; you’re not alone. In fact, acknowledging that your inner child is wounded is the first significant step toward healing.
My Inner Child is Coming Out and It Hurts
You might notice patterns that trigger you or make you uncomfortable. That’s your inner child crying for attention. When my inner child is coming out and it hurts, I usually take this as a sign to pause and reflect. What is the lesson here? What is my inner child trying to tell me?
Incorporating these practices and insights into your life can be transformative. A wounded inner child can be the source of many emotional and psychological challenges, but remember, you have the power to heal.
A Word from Create Higher Vibrations!
I hope you enjoy using this meditation with the guidance of your Higher Self…and that you are able to find some peace and comfort with your inner child.
If you would like to work with me on healing your inner child, please schedule a session here!!
Listen to the Inner Child Meditation here!